| two year anniversary of the mini fridge... |
[14 Feb 2005|04:56pm] |
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crash into me - dmb |
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you won't see this and probably won't hear about it, but if your mom doesn't give you my messege then, Happy Birthday Thomas...
"I couldn't sleep last night because I know that it's over between us. I'm not bitter any more, because I know that what we had was real. And if in some distant place in the future we see each other in our new lives, I'll smile at you with joy and remember how we spent the summer beneath the trees, learning from each other and growing in love. The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds, and that's what you've given me. That's what I hope to give to you forever. I love you. I'll be seeing you."
"They didn't agree on much. In fact they rarely agreed on anything. They fought all the time and they challenged each other everyday..."
"They fell in love, didn't they? Yes, they did. "
"It wasn't over, it still isn't over."
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| :) |
[16 Jan 2005|02:01pm] |
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my chemical romance |
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good time last night guys, thanks for comming!! ill try to post pictures asap. :)
xoxomaryxoxo
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| snowday! |
[06 Jan 2005|10:58am] |
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green day - holiday |
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yay for snowday! today i have to pack and get ready for the weekend. im so excited! then me and jess are going to make cupcakes for my birthday!! its on saturday but we decided that we wanted to bring in cupcakes for schwark's class. its going to be a great day!
okay now for everyone who likes me enough to do something with me for my birthday, gimme some ideas. do you guys all wanna go to dinner and movie? fun station for some laser tag and ddr? call me or leave a comment or something because i wanna do something with all my friends on saturday the 15th. okie dokie hokie pokie? don't forget!
girlies, im so sorry i can't go to your show or competition this weekend, but i know your going to rock. i wish you all the best of luck and im so pissed i have to miss your skanky chair dance. i love you all soooo much and don't worry ill call you and wish you luck again! you will all do amazing!! xoxoxoxo AND FOR EVERYONE ELSE OUT THERE, DANCE TEAM SHOW FRIDAY NIGHT. GO! DANCE COMPETITION SATURDAY. GO!
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| uhhhh |
[04 Jan 2005|08:18pm] |
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im not okay - my chemical romance |
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deleted my last entry. i dont care anymore.
birthdays on saturday. yay. can't wait to leave on friday.
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| happy new year! |
[02 Jan 2005|12:49am] |
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look what you've done - jet |
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i have a good feeling about this year. i hope im right!
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| marshmellows |
[18 Dec 2004|06:29pm] |
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falling for you - nsync |
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life is good. snowball was fun, 1140 on my SATs, christmas soon, birthday in two weeks, yay!
xoxoxo *smile, santa claus is comming soon*
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| hi |
[27 Nov 2004|10:18pm] |
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maroon 5 |
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things are absolutly fabulous! i have the greatest parents in the world, the bestest friend(s) anyone could ask for, and everything is somehow just falling into place. i don't wanna jinx it, but life is good.
p.s i hope everyone had an incredible thanksgiving! xoxo
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[30 Oct 2004|08:45pm] |
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Homewrecker - gretchen wilson (lol caity) |
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Happy Halloween!
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| hi |
[21 Oct 2004|07:09pm] |
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against all odds, never to far away, true |
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havent updated in a while. ive been so busy and everytime i get this blank screen i figure theres to much to say and yet i don't wanna write about any of it. but ill write about some stuff cause im bored.
mom and dad think im "on edge" latley. apparently im "intense, and hyper" and everyone has noticed it but me. my character might get all messed up and i might become permantly damaged (LOL), so they worry and tell me because they "love me". how lovely. mom complains because she doesn't know any of my friends, so i told her (being sarcastic) that ill have a party and invite all my friends .:the crew:. and she was like WOW! THATS A GREAT IDEA! so who knows, we might be having a get together night guys! lol so guys if i grow up and end up in a mental institute its because im stressed today, and just because i "get good grades doesn't mean that i don't make mistakes that could effect me in the future and today" hahahahaha oh man they make me giggle with glee sometimes.
although thats hysterical, i am majorly stressed. its "beginning middle of school syndrom" i have a zillion apps. due and a million clubs im joining. SATs are comming up soon and im not to excited. nothing to bad tho. all the apps are due monday so i shall be destressed when there all in.
on an awesome note, im starting to look at colleges and im majorly excited about it. im going to visit hott john (tehhehe girlies you all know who im talkin about ;))and lauren at York in PA. i haven't seen them in so long. im thrilled to look at the college, it sounds amazing and looks awesome on paper.
other then that, sunshine didn't work out :( but im still looking thru those binoculars (wina...have i told you lately i love you?) ive seen tom a little this week and that makes me sooo happy, hes amazing. and school is okay.
...tommorrow is october 22nd.....everyone knows that i fell in love two years ago....
....happy anniversary... heres to the best day of my life..... together or not...
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| solo again |
[03 Oct 2004|06:15pm] |
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evanescence |
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well mary and ryan are over. everyone knows why. thank you to everyone, all of my friends, and family, for being amazing for the past few days. Mom says that i have to kiss a lot of frogs before i find my prince. she says i should know what that means now. it hurts, i think you all know that,and the self esteem i had is completly gone, and its just going to take a long while. you guys all rock tho. all my girls thank you for making me laugh and just being there, i love you all so much. all my guys, i love you all so much your like brothers to me and theres no one in this world that can make me feel better or smile during shit like this. thank you guys, i love you all soooo much. i know who i can really count on...
"i did enough to show you that i was willing to give and sacrifice.i was the one who was lifting you up when u thought your life had had enough. i don't want you to feel sorry for me, you never gave us a chance to be. i'm not upset, i'm not angry, i'm just sorry i was being myself and i'm sorry that that wasnt' good enough for you"
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| homecomming part 1 |
[01 Oct 2004|07:48pm] |
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well today was a good day which is a great change for me. me and mina looked awesome and had a great day. the pep rally was amazing. Jer, Jeremy, and Sully came to school and we had a great time. Then Jeremy A dressed up in the ram costume and was the be mascot ever! Dancers were fabulous, as usual. Very cool dance this year girls!
The dance was fun! i had a great time dancing with all my girls, garvo, jimmy, jas, and everyone else. i met sooo many new people today! leah, a very amazing sophmore who is my gym buddy along with john, and chirs of course ;). Chris, a kid in my math class that makes me laugh hysterically!! Justin, a very funny, nice, out going, random guy who turns out to also be a junior. im so glad i made new friends. theres also sunshine and walk in boy. lol good times.
well me and mina are having a sleepover. She was the best date ever tonight. We both didn't have dates so we decided to go together and it turned out amazing. we watched the fireworks together, danced, and had a good time. something was missing though. i know exactly what it was, im just not allowed to say it...
"don't walk away..."
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| crappy week |
[30 Sep 2004|07:36pm] |
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"you'll think of me" sorry dani you got it stuck in my head |
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ive had a bad few days. tommorrow will be different. for it is the mission of marina and myself to make it the greatest day ever...
homecomming will be amazing. our outfits are hott, i get to see will again, all the boys are comming (!!!! )and wina and i are having a fabulous sleepover!! its also a gellar bowl! the boys have a lot of fun at them so i think there great!!
Ryan has a game in Mass friday night so i wish him the best of luck and i hope you guys win. Safe trip!
Happy Birthday William Hatcher!! have a great time being 19 buddy!!
thomas, man i love you soo much. thanks for just being you. you always know how to brighten my day, even if its with rubberbands and a phone.
Good luck to all participants of the Gellar Bowl, may the best video gamer win!
Girls, im sorry i have been so down lately, i love you all and thanks for being there for me through everything. Im am so lucky to have all of you and this year has been and will be the greatest junior year a girl could ask for. i love you all sooo much!
lol this was like the Shoutout lj entry. anyways, i love the crew and all of my friends, nobody ever forget that no matter what happens.
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[21 Sep 2004|06:13pm] |
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you - amy lee |
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the past few days have been great fun. Saturday, me, ryan, and wina went to the movies to see Wimbleton..yea its about tennis. other then that i have no comment. then we all went to Taco Bell, and then off to ryans for a fun filled night, talking and laughing with his mommy. o and reading hot sauce packets. :) thanks for the absolutly fabulous time guys. it really cheered me up.
the sunday, it was my sisters 18th bday. she loved her new perfume and was so excited about it. im glad i made a smile. I also had my little brothers frist ever football game with the carmel cheifs. they played yorktown and beat them! yay! it was so cool.
hmmm monday was boring. kinda a bad day and i was just a little grumpy. Ryan made my day by bringing me a McFlurry with m+ms and visited me at work. thanx buddy it was really thoughtful and i felt much better after.
then today i had a pretty good day. after school me and rina went on one of our amazing trips. we went to drop off chrisy and then to get some gas at hess. it was such a great time. we rocked out to spice girls and laughed at the guys hitting on us in mysterious ways at the place. it was such a great time.
i thought i should re-phrase myself in this last paragraph. me and marina have become closer. i have a lot of best friends and i didn't think that just saying i had one was dumb. but to anyone who cares, i love everyone in the crew and consider them all best friends. i didn't mean to single mina out and say that she was the only one. i have many and i love them all sooo much. im sorry if it caused some controversy, all i was saying was that me and mina have gotten closer and talk a lot more now. but i have about 15 best friends and ashley, caity, momo, dani, mina, amanda, and chrisy are like my sisters. the guys are like my brothers.
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| shes so lucky... :) |
[18 Sep 2004|05:49pm] |
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take it all away - ryan cabrera |
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i always get this blank screen and i never know what to say anymore. its not that theres nothing going on, its just i don't know what to write about or what not. but i think if i start writing i won't stop. oh well lets see what happens.
so i wake up completly ill this morning. everyone in there mother was telling me it was just allergies, well its not im really sickly. lol its gross but oh well. nothing horrible.
i was thinking today that i am extreamly lucky. im a healthy (well most of the time, semi okay looking, not really poor, i have a great job, a car, a lisense, and a family that i like some of the time ;), amazing friends, decent grades, adn yea i think thats it . i am so lucky i mean yea shit happens but when you really sit down and look at things, they can be soo much worse and it just really upsets me to think that im taking things for granted and i just erally odn't know what or who i have sometimes.
mina, me and ryan are going to the movies and taco bell so im outta here.. g'night all. xoxo
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| .... |
[12 Sep 2004|09:59am] |
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superman - five for fighting |
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wowzers! i haven't updated in a long time. everything has just been so crazy and mixxed up i guess. this might be a long one. i can't tell yet.
well Tom and Mary broke up. again. it was all on me this time and its what i "wanted" although not really. its the most confusing thing i have ever done in my life. i sat down and realy thought about what was going on, what i wanted, and how things worked between us. I thought about the past two years we've had together and each time we've been together in those two years. i thought about why things weren't like freshmen year anymore and how come things in the beginning were amazing, but as time went on something started missing. everyone is like "oh tom and mary belong together and you guys are the perfect couple and if you guys can't make it theres no hope." Yea that was true freshmen year. he was my everything, and anything. we were madly in love and not one person or anything could have changed that. we made it thruthe entire school year with each other still being our dream b/f g/f we rarely faught and we had a great time. we sumo wrestled with pillows up our shirts and just ran straight towards each other. we played video games and had nights were we spend $50 on food from shopright and just came back and ate it all and watched movies. there were times when we would just drive and he would get frustrated because i have A.D.D and would just look out the window. tiems when we would go to haunted houses and he would scare the shit out of me but that night i still loved him more then anything in the world. we went thru it all, the goood the bad and the car engine blowing up in a parking lot. but somewhere in that whole time frame of my freshmen year going into sophmore somethign went wrong, we hit a fork in the road. things went to shit so quickly, and not between him and me but just eveerything. my whole world just crashed down on me and i just lost everything including myself. i couldn't eat, i threw up constantly, i couldn't sleep, and the only thing i could do and worst of all i could think. that summer was the worst time in my life. it was the hardest thing i have ever gotten thru. yes, i got stronger but i also got scarred permanantly. i never thought that i would ever be the same again. i lost tom, i lost my mind, i lost all respect for myself, i blamed everything on me, and i just watned to die then and there. i lost abour 20 pounds and i never gained the weight back. its all just a blurr now, but somethign things i just couldn't forget. so tom and mary talekd and figured things out, decided that we both weren't happy and wanted each other back. i left after that convo with him for camp. one week. thinking i was comming home to a new life and my thomas. yet again i was wrong. i think everyone knows what happened and that ruined me. i decided to forgive but somehow i couldn't forget. it was just always there in everything. we got back together and celebrated our one year. things were different tho. everything had changed, we changed. for the better or the worst i don't know. i didn't want to know. i was paranoid, a mess, scared, and trying to make somethign from the past come back to life. that was Tom and mary. things worked adn they were great but they wern't the same. we broke up again. a horrible break up. mean words, feelings, and just frustration prevailed against us. we didn't really speak after that. another horriblke time in my life. i always tried to talk but it was akward, weird, and just not comfortable. we went our seperate ways, i was single and in high school. i met someone . i met will. enough said im skipping this part. i was BLINDED by all the shit in my life and all the crap that i had some part in creating nothing was clear and i never thought it would be. i got hurt. emotions went wild and crying was an everyday occurance. no one cared, thats what i thought. the only person that cared was with someone else and it was okay, i just felt like i had no one. friends and family were there, i just didn't see them. im sorry i didn't see or talk to them. i was scared to open up to anyone else. then amanda's party happened, a turning point in my sophmore year. i got piss ass drunk with mina and had a great time, but the car ride home was somethign i will never forget. only two people know what was said and how powerful those words were. it was the first time me and tom had talked since the break up. like really talked about everything. i spilled my life before him and told him everything i was feeling. i told him things i would never tell anyone else, like how i let my phone ring twice before i picked it up when he called so he would think i had a life. lol (yea im a loser) that morning i got a call reallly early, i had a pounding headache and some parts of me just hurt. it was tom fufilling his promise to call me from then on. so we started talking again and pretty soon we were together again. now were here. i feel as tho somethign is missing and has been since we broke up about a year or so ago. just somethign inside me that can't be happy because somethign is missing. so i broke it off and decided that i wanted to stay friends. close non fake friends. i figured that we've never tried being friends before and maybe the secret to our relationship lies in a freindship somewhere. i really don't know. i love tom so much. and i always will. my dream still holds. he knows that and one day maybe it will happen again. and not just us going out. but maybe one day Tom and Mary will happen again. the famous couple that Jen piero hated and no one thought would last. The realtionship that i started high school with and had the best year of my life during. The couple i was convinced would grow old together and never fade. maybe it was fate that led us to this, maybe were not supposed to be lovers but friends. if its the only way to keep him in my life so be it. i never want to lose him. people think im crazy, but love is crazy and my love for tom is just so out of this world i don't expect anyone to understand. i feel like this is the right thing to do, the right path to take and the best choice for the future. i cna't explain myself because i don't know how, but i can't lie to myself or to tom and live something i can't feel. im open to the dating world again and im scared to death with everything in me. i don't know whats going to happen, but i know that i will never stop calling tom or stop asking him to hang out with me. its gonig to be hard and sometimes i cry because i've hurt him but something tells me that everythign will be okay and that not only is this the right choice but the only choice for me. tom was my first and my true. i never forget and i never want to lose somethign taht special. im sorry to him and i wish it made sense. it hurts when i think its over, but sometimes i think part of me ended when Tom and Mary did back in last summer. i still love you and always will tom, even all you know or understand is that.
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[26 Aug 2004|01:40pm] |
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ashlee simpson |
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omg! so much has happened, and i just like never update anymore... i think its just because im kinda busy. but anywho, im finally like working and that whole thing is going great. i went to lake compounce yesterday! it was so much fun! they have a water park thing there which is great and i ran into a lot of people i knew so that was cool.
OMG! i was doing something and tom had gone off to go on some rides with my little brother. So i was waiting for him and this guys sits next to me and starts completly hitting on me and asked what my name was and like how pretty i was a stuff. it was realy flattering and he wasn't like ugly but he was a year younger. it was soo random. he was by himself and props to him for acctually comming up to me. he asked me like who i came with and i was like well im here with my BOYFRIEND who is on some ride with my little brother. and he was like oo. apparently he lives in beacan and when he was leaving (cause i made it clear i wasn't into him lol) he winked and was like maybe ill see you around sometime. LOL it was soo funny. but it did make my day.
i g2g to work. byebye xoxoxoxo
shawn and mike i miss you both.. i hope school is going well. much love
xomaryxo
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| classes |
[19 Aug 2004|07:21pm] |
1 ADV BIO AP BIRCHMAN 205 123456 YEAR SCI260 1
2 AD BIO APLAB BIRCHMAN 205 2 4 YEAR SCI261 1
3 AP AMER HIST MURPHY, N 122 123456 YEAR SOC131 3
4 ENGLISH 11R CADDEN 302 123456 YEAR ENG071 2
5 SPANISH IVH FORMAN 129 123456 YEAR LAN415 2
6 SYMPH BAND BOHIN FA3 123456 YEAR MUS654 1
7 MATH CRSE B MURPHY 210 123456 YEAR MAT332 4
8 PHY ED 11-12 KAM GYM 2 4 6 YEAR PHE786 24
9 LUNCH SEM 1 CAFE 123456 SEM1 LUN795 7
9 LUNCH SEM 2 CAFE 123456 SEM2 LUN796 7
HR HOMEROOM SCI SANTAMARIA 205 123456 YEAR HMRSCI 1
anyone in the same classes? i have to switch it up a bit but it won't change that much. :)
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| long time no update |
[12 Aug 2004|01:35pm] |
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gavin degraw - belief |
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well, i haven't updated in a while but i think its because i a) have no time and/or b) nothing really fabulous is going on in my life. but anyways, last night i dyed my hair. well i put highlights in...my hair is a kinda red, color. its nice, but i dunno if i like it yet. im still debating. it looks awesome in some light and it looks like crap in some other lights. i have to live with it for a few days and see if i wanna keep it. if not ill just dye my hair all one color. we'll see...
hmm other then that ive been driving about everywhere to see everyone and its been great. i got a job finally and its the most amazing job in the world. im working at the cleaners on mon, wed, and fri. 2-7 and the only time i realyl have to work is when someone comes in. if no ones there (which is usually the case) then i just hang out, call people, do hw, watch tv, or anythign along those lines. its gunna be soo great!! props to sio who helped me get the job.
so i was thinking a lot about my classes and such next year. i want to drop guitar and take dance instead of gym. im so anxious to get my schedual so i can change it asap. im really hoping that i have frees with the girls and some classes with them. that would be sooo amazing. but either way next year is going to be fabulous.
xoxo
the end.
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| road test |
[04 Aug 2004|05:19pm] |
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road tunes |
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I passed my road test!!
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| happy birth russ! |
[02 Aug 2004|11:10pm] |
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hello - evanescence |
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today was fun. i went to marina's in the afternoon to make decorations and stuff for russ's birth (day) which was today. we hung them up for the game and i think he was really excited. at the game all the girls got a chance to talk and just be the best of friends. i love them so much. they always make me laugh and we always just have everything in the world to talk about. its amazing how much i love my friends and i don't know what iwould do without any of them. dani, we missed you :( . were all hopefully going to be having some girls nights and such so im excited for that. girls i love you so much...mina, ash, caity, chrisy, dani, momo... you all are my heros and idols...
2 days left... excitment and nervous like whao...
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